Either way, it is real for the person experiencing it and we all have to cope with it in one way or another.
My children, I feel, went through mine and their fathers divorce in a sad and emotionally hurtful way, and thanks to many twisted truths, bitter, spiteful and a hateful tongue, and his outright lies told them by their bio father, they have even suffered more than most. (so I've heard and seen).
Although I have heard many talks like these throughout my life, today I listened to an awesome talk about "Healing the Tragic Scars of Abuse", by Elder Richard G. Scott, and thought especially about one of my very bitter sons, and how he could REALLY benefit from listening and applying this advice in his own life.
Elder Scott is one of my favorite speakers.
He is kind, soft spoken, and so Christ-like. He gives excellent talks.
Please do take the time to listen or read this recent one of his.