I have left Birthday messages for you every year on my profiles and blogs....lots of places...hoping one day that you would search me out and read these.
I recently just learned that you have been reading some of my blogs and I was sooooooooo happy to hear this, since I always wanted you to see my love for you even if I was unable to do much for you or have contact with you. Especially during the years that I did not even know where you were! Yikes!
Many times when I would try to do something nice for you...something would happen and I was unable to, it just wasn't ment to be. But that is ok...you will always be my son even when I am old.
This will never change for me...and I am grateful for this eternal principal. It was the only thing that kept me hoping for the day the door would be open again.
God taught me that this door had to be opened by YOU...not me.
It was a hard lesson to learn...since my love for you was so great. I had to learn to "trust" God that he would do for me, what I could not do for myself.
So, If you do not see this message for many years into the future...I will be so happy just for the fact that you SAW it.
I think I will play a violin song for you and post it on my You Tube.
MInd you...I am NOT that great of a violinist...but it makes my heart sing when I am able to play something soft and sweet...just like my dear grandmother Helena (Oma, my moms mom).
She was my angel in my life and I sure do miss her. Life is so fleeting and short, that we must do all we can to bring LOVE into others lives...not hatred and a closed door. It is important to never cross certian lines where we can not take back what we do not really mean. And if we do mean it, sometimes it is important just not to say it....because maybe we just didn't know ALL the facts and our words could REALLY hurt others. Sometimes we never have the chance to say I am sorry....and then we suffer horribly for that. Remember...Love is the answer.
If you love something, let it go....if it comes back to you...it was always Yours....Let Go..... and Let God....