“Mormonism is truth; and every man who embraces it feels himself at liberty to embrace every truth"
OK friends...below is a video of another intelligent and inspirational talk, or speech:
Do you think I am audacious??
“Mormonism is truth; and every man who embraces it feels himself at liberty to embrace every truth"
OK friends...below is a video of another intelligent and inspirational talk, or speech:
Don't be afraid, ....to seek TRUTH.
This is an intelligent talk, or speech, on
The Way....The Truth....The Life
Become a Seeker
Also, the YouTube video is below.....
Merry Christmas 1995! . . .
On this page, we see Jordan and Austin enjoying Christmas 1995. They were opening presents and being very cute.
My personal camera took OK pictures...but left most of my subjects with 'red eye' syndrome. (Ha Ha) Regardless, I ALWAYS made doubles or triple copies of my photos being processed at Walmart. They always offered doubles and triples to which I would order every time, so that I could send one copy to family and keep the other two at home. One in a box and one for my album I would make.
(Thank goodness I did this, because when it came to my divorce, years later, Bernd got all the photos in boxes that were the doubles. We split ALL photos! He got half, I got half.
* Unfortunately we were unable to split the videos tapes, so he took MOST of them and I was lucky to find a one or two in the storage unit we had, when Bernd had kept almost EVERYTHING we owned, when we split up. I had forgotten about videos)
I am thankful that I am able to at least share these few photos I have, here with you, my family and friends.
I am just sad that I do NOT have my video tapes of my children. We took LOTS of them over the years....but I don't ever get to see them. (Maybe one day, my children will finally share some??)
....and A Happy New Year!!
Dear Jordan, Austin, Jacob, and Andrew,
I am sure that from time to time, you wonder about your brother's progress.
If not now, then maybe one day in the future you would like to finally remember him and come to this Blog and read about him, anyway.
Either way, here he is.
This year, 2016 your brother Alex is doing very well.
**He is happy, healthy, in his Senior year of High School, and taking some nice College classes along with his Senior electives. (like Emergency Medical Responder)
He has applied to one of the BEST Medical Schools in the Nation and is sure to get a Scholarship to this awesome school.
He has one of the best jobs in our County, for a young person!
He is a server, at the most expensive restaurant, in the largest city in our area.
He does very well there. (so blessed)
Alex plans on being a Doctor of sorts. His plan is to be an Orthopedic Surgeon, but he says that if things don't go as planned, he will be a Doctor of some sort, regardless of what degree. He loves the Medical field, just like his mother.
He is such a 'people person' that I am sure he will do very well, in whatever medical field he goes into.
He is tall (5' 11" right now and still growing and maybe will be 6ft, like his Grandpa Hatch?) and of a normal weight...just like his brother Jordan. They both have the same body types. He is handsome, as well. His face looks very much like Andrews, though. They could be twins. ☺☺
He loves, loves, loves his pet cat, "Kitty". He is our Orange kitten (who is around 6 months old).
Alex is a tremendous help, with difficult tasks, for his elderly grandfather, Grandpa Hatch, and also for his step-dad, who is getting older. (Whom Alex loves both of them very much)
We will miss all of his help, when he is off in College soon.
I believe the State of Utah is wanting compensation of thousands of dollars from Bernd for past child support.
Also, I had paid Bernd Holler thousands and thousands of dollars for the child support of Alexander from 5 years old to 18 years old, back in 2004, which over the years he did NOT give back any of this to us, or Gramps, for raising his son and financial responsibility, of Alex.
Yes, he owes us thousands and thousands of dollars in child support.
We have taken a huge monetary loss, without Bernds help with raising Alex. We have been contemplating to turn in the proper paperwork and give the State of Utah license to pursue for past child support.
Alex is the light of our lives and we tell him often of how grateful we are to have him in our lives. The whole town and most of the County here knows and loves Alex! Yes, you heard right. Almost EVERYONE around this County knows Alex and loves him. (especially since all summer while he worked as a cashier at Wal-mart, he got to know most of everyone in Richfield and the surrounding areas)
We can't go anywhere these days without people stopping to talk to Alex...even strangers! He is so friendly and well loved.
Anyway, he is buying a car right now (and I think he has a girlfriend? He won't tell me...hehe) and he is always driving off somewhere.
He is really enjoying his Senior year and is excited with his BIG plans for the future.
Please, sons, drop him a line, if you can. (he is easily found on FB) He is convinced that you do not like or love him, since your dad Bernd has not allow any of you to contact him over the past 10 years.
If you do reach out to him this year, realize as a minor, he tells me of your conversations, because of his great respect and love for his mother, your mother... and how he knows that this is the right thing to do.
However, if your relationship is just friendly and non-legal or threatening to Alex's happiness (and even your happiness) he would be happy to hear from you.
With that said, he does not appreciate when you bash or disrespect me, (your mother) in any way....just like you would not appreciate him verbally bashing any of your loved ones...OK? (so he says to me)
Just keep your conversations friendly, trustworthy, and respectful with Alex, and he will do the same for you. That can't be too hard.
I pray that you boys, my deeply loved sons, will always be best of friends, with great respect and love for each other...and remember, that includes Alexander, your youngest brother too.
We have always prayed that you would have a respectful, open communication with us and especially with your brother... and are sad that others would not allow this for you and for him, over many years. 😢
We are extremely proud of Alex..... and for the exceptional young man he has become and is becoming...
(and also proud of many of you , for the good you are accomplishing)
... and for the growth all of you have reached thus far,
however there is still much more maturity you must reach....and we pray that you will continue to grow in faith, hope, understanding, truth, light, and most importantly 'respect' of others, and of yourselves.
Love and blessing, to all of you this day, and for always,
♥ Mom (Alex too)
AUG 9TH, 7:29AM
Jacob....its me, mom.
I know we are not connected, but I have no where else to leave you these private messages...and HOPE that someday you will get them. So here is one that you might be interested in.......
Last night (this early morning actually) Aug 9th 2016, I had an incredible dream with my Jacob, myself and a tiny bit of Alex somewhere in the mix. My Jacob was 9 years old most of this dream, but I did see him a bit as a young man too.....
....in this dream, I somehow found Jacob and we talked and talked and communicated about his life and the about the time we were separated at his young age of 9. He showed me (in this dream) all his pain, anguish, hopes, fears and abandonment issues that he went through when I was no longer in his life....I FELT THEM....then he shared the fact that he had thought of running away from his fathers home during those years...to come find me...when he was 9. He showed me his pain he felt at being (what he thought and felt) abandoned by me and how sad he was that I could do this to him. I felt and understood every bit of this.... I cried and cried deeply in this dream...
...then I saw bits and pieces of him as a young man....places he went...people he knew...girls that were in love with him...people who had tried to deceive him...some of his dark days.
...I explained many things to Jacob in this dream...of how I NEVER meant to abandon him...and how I understood his pain and felt for him...I tried to help him understand this...but he couldn't hear me...
...then in the end, I found myself surrounding him....my arms around the front of him....like I was a blanket that had him cradled, as my 9 year old, in my lap....my whole body around him from his back....and I CRIED and PRAYED from the depths of my Heart and Soul...and I told God as I held you tight.... " "Please!, I NEVER want to leave this precious child...my Jacob...ever again...please don't let this happen ever again...PLEASE!"...
...then I woke up from the dream. (it was about 6:30am) And I was sad...and I understood clearly the PAIN you, Jacob, lived through...how painful my children's lives were....how confusing they were....how lonely they were....how abandoned they felt....how they did not understand WHY this had happened to them...to you Jacob...and I cried.
...so Jacob...I am here today....writing you this...minutes after I had this incredibly insightful dream....begging you for forgiveness...and letting you know that 'although it appeared that I had let you go, and abandoned you...I NEVER did...my heart and soul have prayed and ached for you every single day of YOUR LIFE away from me'. I have tried to reach out to you...but am unable to...mostly because I can NOT find you. IF EVER, you would like to reconnect....I would hope that someday you will finally see how much I did and DO LOVE you...beyond your wildest imagination...and how YOU are my World , my Heart, and my Soul and that I WANT YOU IN MY LIFE...always have...always will.....
....I LOVE and MISS you like there is NO time and space....
My door, heart, and home are ALWAYS open to you and your loved ones....WHEREVER ~ WHENEVER!! No Strings Attached!!!
~~ Please do not be afraid or angry with me....and if you are...how can I NOT understand...
♥ ♥ ♥
(This love and thoughts apply to all my children - Austin, Jordan, Andrew AND Alex)
Happy Birthday, dearest son! Autumn is my favorite season, so your birthday is a special one to my heart, and for other reasons too ♥
Let me tell you a story, one that has been told before, but nevertheless, one that I will tell again and again, until its value and splendor reaches your inner soul.
It was 25 years ago, during a warm, sunny, happy Summer in Mission Viejo, California that someone unexpectedly came to visit me.
It was the spirit of a little boy.
I can see and feel it in my heart and mind, like it was yesterday. There I sat in my upstairs master bedroom bathroom, getting ready for what would be a fun day ahead, with my cute, first child, and 2 year old toddler, in our new, upscale home.
Instantly, out of nowhere, I felt a small boys Spirit right in front of me, on my right side, next to the glass shower door. The thoughts instantly came to me that it was time for my first born child to have a sibling. Who? That 'someone' next to me, wanted to join our family. I felt him....I could see him in my mind's eye. He was REAL!
Being so young, I couldn't describe what had just happened to me, until years later when I could look back on it, however I instantly knew it was time for a new person to be born into our family and I joyously and obediently moved forward with taking steps to bring this desire about.
So, soon after this Spiritual experience, that same day, when my husband came into our master bedroom I had a feeling of attraction, for him, sweep over me, like never before. I had always 'liked' my husband, and found him somewhat good looking, but I was never passionately attracted to him, so this was a strange, new, and unexpected feeling sweeping over me.
I immediately acted upon this new feeling being placed in my heart, with real genuine passion, and unexpected desire, and approached my husband and began to kiss him, with the intent to become intimate with him.
He had ALWAYS been 'all over me', phyically, ever since we had met, so I was sure he would be more than receptive to 'get it on' with me. Of course, this actually was the first time this passion was being initiated by me, and even I was surprised at my NEW feelings of attraction. WHERE had they come from? How would he react? I was sure he would be receptive.
Boy, was I quickly rejected!
My husbands immediate reaction was one of surprise. He gave me a weird look of "what's this about?" and instantly told me 'he wasn't interested'.
My heart sank! I felt incredible, real deep, rejection!!
I instantly closed down my heart, and knew I would NEVER try something like that again! EVER!! I was SO very hurt!
I had just been following my heart, and THIS was what I got??
So, I tried to shake it off, and later (casually and kindly) approached my husband with the idea of having another child? What did he think? How did he feel about this?
He was instantly against it!! He had NO interest in this idea!
But, our son needed a brother? Didn't he?
He didn't agree. He told me that baby Austin had overwhelmed him and that IF he ever agreed to another child, it would be YEARS from then.
It Didn't matter what I said, he was adamantly against it!! He wouldn't budge.
(I thought, 'HOW cruel'. When I married him, I knew he was an only child and very selfish and so I had been fine being the main caregiver of baby Austin, and of any children we were going to end up having. I did MOST of the work. I wasn't asking for myself. I just 'KNEW' it was time!)
Over the next few days, as I sadly pondered my plight, the Holy Ghost reminded me of what I had been taught all my life, that the Power of Prayer could accomplish ANYTHING!
What did I have to lose?
I had already been saying my prayers morning and night anyway. So, in private, without my husband knowing, over the next few months, I pleaded in prayer, with the heavens, to 'soften my husband's heart' to favor me with a child. To grant me heavens desires.... of adding a new sibling to our small family.
He knew nothing of my actions or pleadings! I said nothing.
Then about two months later, out of the blue, my husband says to me, "You know what?, I guess we could start 'trying' to have a new child".
I was in shock! My prayers had been answered, and I instantly had gained a testimony of the 'Power of Prayer'!
So, we began 'trying' to create a new child for our family. I was somewhat disappointed month after month that it was not happening. Had we missed our window of opportunity? WHY was I not getting pregnant??
Sure enough, right after the Holidays, I became pregnant with you, son, and I was super excited!!! Your due date was for the end of Sept. (finally)
I had a few complications with your pregnancy, however, two weeks late, you finally arrived.... and by miracles, prayers, and the power of the Priesthood of God, you and I both survived a rocky pregnancy, dangerous delivery and miraculous birth!
You truly were and are a miracle made by Heaven!
You must be someone VERY important to the Heavens! (??)
All I know, is that while you grew up, you sure had LOTS of genuine LOVE for me, your mom. You would write me the most special 'love' notes, all the time, while you were growing up.
You are quick to anger (little bit of a temper) ...but also quick to forgive... and move on.
I will miss you this 24th birthday....as always, just like I have for the past 13 birthdays ....since the day you walked out my door, and I have missed so much of your life.
My prayers these days are for your happiness, success, real Joy...and most importantly for your 'Spiritual Safety'.
In a world where it is so easy to lose ones soul, I pray that you never do.
Remember WHO you truly are,
WHERE you came from, and
WHO truly loves you....for real.
How ever late you are, you have not traveled beyond true love....
Have a special birthday, on your autumn day....this day of when you were physically born, with those you love and those who love you!
Blessings and Love sent your way, on this day, through this avenue here and through the one YOU taught me about and came through,
Grandpa Hatch turned 83 years young today. He was born in 1933.
He is doing very well. He has a walker for days when his back hurts. Other than that, he is getting around great and still swims every day. He just renewed his driver's license for another 5 years.
He still cooks a storm away in his kitchen and it usually is a big mess for me to clean up from time to time. He has more food than what he knows what to do with. No shortage at Gramps house. (Just make sure it's not growing legs to walk away....hehehe) If I am out of something...I just go to his house for it. He's loaded! (with goodies, that is)
We sang "Happy Birthday ♪ ♫" to him, and brought him a Red Velvet cake to eat, birthday balloons, (don't let Alex get a hold of these), and Pumpkin Eggnog to drink.
We had a nice evening with my Pops!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAD!!
On this page, it is still October 1995. We see another picture of Jordan, Austin and baby Jacob sitting on our front porch in Manti, Utah on our wicker chair. 3 beautiful boys. I was so proud.
Next to this, you see a picture of a little girl named 'Lisa'. When we had gone to Germany in 1992 we had visited and stayed with Oma's cousin in Germany. Her daughter, Carolin, had just gotten married. A few years later Carolin and her husband had a baby girl and decided to name her 'Lisa' (after me, they say) since they liked this name so much. This is a picture of their little girl 'Lisa' which was taken while they happen to come to California (USA) for the first time. You can see that they stayed with Oma and Opa in their home in Ojai CA. (You can see Bernds graduation photo in the background) We had come to visit them also while they were there.
Above, you see family photos taken in Utah, up Stevens Canyon at our new Cabin being built. We would stay in Grandpa Hatch's cabin, while we would work on our 5000 sq foot cabin. This time we invited our good friends, The Wrights (Peter, Torrie and their kids Andrew and McCall) up to this wilderness to stay with us for some fun. The fall colors were SO spectacular that we just had to take family photos. Its hard to pick up the vibrancy of these amazing fall colors, with the old camera, but trust me, the colors were much brighter and more dazzling, than what you see here.
Watch them, "Disturbed", sing this old classic....
Hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Within the sound of silence
In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone
'Neath the halo of a street lamp
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence
And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people, maybe more
People talking without speaking
People hearing without listening
People writing songs that voices never share
And no one dared
Disturb the sound of silence
Fools, said I, you do not know
Silence like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my arms that I might reach you
But my words, like silent raindrops fell
And echoed in the wells of silence
And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made
And the sign flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And the sign said, the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls
And whispered in the sounds of silence
The Presidential Elections are right around the corner.
No matter WHO you vote for......Please, take these intelligent and WISE words, from my previous neighbor and former Supreme Court Justice Judge (background) , into mind and consideration BEFORE you vote....
Watch or read Elder Oaks's entire address
OR .... If you have fast internet, I've attached another copy of this video here.
~Mother of 6 Handsome Sons.
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